Back to square one

To admit that this is the hardest summer of my life is a testament to how truly easy my sheltered little life is. This summer is really rocking my world.

It has been a good 31 days since the exterminators first sprayed our apartment for bed bugs. It has been 18 days since we have last seen a live bed bug. 4 days ago we got the go-ahead to finally purchase a couch. The bed bugs are gone!! (fingers crossed!) The problem is, they are not gone in my head. 


When I enter a room, I quickly scan the base boards then the edge between the walls and the ceiling for bed bugs. I know I am crazy though, because I will do this in other people's homes and at the store as well. I thought the red pepper flakes in our meal last week were bedbugs. When I get bug bites, (which happens a lot here) I get on the internet and search "bed bug bites" just in case I forgot what bed bug bites look like. I look up and down my sheets before I go to bed and when I wake up in the morning I check for new bed bug blood stains. If I get an itch at night, I turn on the lights and check for bed bugs. It takes me an hour and twenty-four minutes (I timed myself) to vacuum our small two-bedroom apartment. This OCD thing has got to stop!

We bought a washer and dryer off of craigslist 7 weeks ago. We were finally able to hook it up 3 weeks ago (our maintenance wouldn't let us hook them up until they replaced our AC). Last week, and after just 7 loads of laundry, our washer gave up the ghost and our dryer now takes two-and-a-half 80 minute cycles to dry our towels. How are you supposed to know these things when purchasing off of craigslist? They worked just fine when the guy showed them to us. With the bed bug furniture and now this, we are getting owned by Birmingham's Craigslist! I officially hate craigslist and am now an I-only-buy-brand-new-things snot.

We calculated our total losses the other night with our apartment hopping, bed bug fighting, and washer/dryer dying and it is a little sickening/scary. "So it's like we flushed that much money down the toilet just to fight bed bugs, sit in camping chairs, live out of tubs and garbage bags, and schedule trips to the laundromat around one car and a baby for two plus months?!" I asked Spencer the other night. (The answer is yes.)

My family was going to come out to visit this month, but given the circumstances, they are flying Jack and I out to them instead and we are going to Oceanside, CA. We are leaving tomorrow and I have never felt so guilty leaving Spencer behind who has to work and go to school with just those darn camping chairs and Lost to keep him company. However, I think this trip will be good for me to psychologically prep myself in giving Alabama a second chance. I am really starting to have trust issues with this state, in fact, I'm kind of scared of it. But when I get back, our brand-new-out-of-our-league washer and dryer will be hooked up and our linoleum will be fixed. (The Lowes delivery guys somehow ripped apart our flooring while trying to move out our broken dryer. Seriously, how does that even happen?!)  We will unpack our tubs and move in our belongings that have been cooking in our truck for the past two months. We can buy a couch and was it just me or are these dressers totally the new thing on pinterest right now? ;) And if I can convince Spencer, our broken washer and dryer will be our new bed bug proof night stands so we can get our dang money's worth! (You know your a redneck if.....) Alabama will still be hot and sticky and cockroach-y, but Alabama will be nice to me when I get back, right? Right?! Please!?


While we have had many set backs this summer, I can't deny God's tender mercies and divine guidance along the way. I know God loves our little family and is aware of our situation, even when Spencer prays for us and I irreverantly burst into nonstop laughter because somehow our life and our needs seem pretty comical when I hear it from someone besides me!


Whenever something has gone wrong, or I have felt sorry for myself, three thoughts always pop into my mind that give me comfort and hope. One, it could always be worse. Two, Jeffrey R. Hollands voice telling me, "Don't you quit! You keep walking. You keep trying." (From this video and this talk.)
And three, "life is good!" (The words my mom wrote on our anniversary card to us reminding us of our happy marriage and beautiful baby.)

I am going to love Alabama one day, I just know it!!! But today is not that day, so I'm running away to Oceanside! :)